Chaos x Play x Art

Greetings to old and new readers,

After a brief break from my newsletter to attend to exciting developments in my work, I've grown the capacity to dedicate myself more to explorations of the creative process and am happy to continue sharing it with you all again.

My work with both humans and animals has been opening up new pathways of exploration (I'm a meditation teacher and a dog behaviorist) and what better place to play around with all that has been inspiring me than the medium of writing?

To old readers, the vibe here is still "...what's she going on about? But also, it kind of sounds like fun?!" Like these two images that live on my virtual mood board for this newsletter:

To new readers, welcome! You're probably here because you've attended a class at Eden Harmony Meditation Studio, which is a newly opened practice space/cozy home/oceanside retreat destination to meditators across San Diego. This is a newsletter where I share writings about Meditation, Creation, East, and West. It's the only virtual space I inhabit right now too, so welcome to my social media page, I suppose!

🌎 Earth as Exalted Preciousness 🤲

Recently I stumbled across the etymological origins of the Chinese character for expensive - 貴 - and was deeply moved by the indications of its original, pictographic form.

The very first iteration of the character, shown on the left, shows two hands positioned downwards, lovingly cradling the Earth. We spontaneously, naturally, do the same thing with our hands when holding close a dear child or animal - something precious, highly valued, expensive. When exalting the heavens, (think - glory be to God) our hands do the same thing, just in a different direction.

Earth as exalted preciousness. Earth as expensive, valuable, rich. I love it.

If you're interested in more explorations of archaic Chinese, see this article I wrote on the Chinese character for selfish and how the character illustrates that to be selfish is to be in integrity.

💧New Short Essay Drop💧

The below article was recently published on my website, original link here.

Meditation doesn’t work for you because you’re not a monk

Simply put, the meditation practices that were designed to benefit a monk may not be the practices that benefit us.

The one reason why meditation doesn’t work for you may be simple - it’s because you’re not a monk, but trying to meditate like one.

Meditation has deep, ancient roots that are woven into the fabric of religious and spiritual traditions throughout history. Meditation practices have been carefully preserved and faithfully passed down through generations of dedicated monks, ascetics, and hermits. Because of their collective efforts, modern individuals like ourselves are granted the invaluable opportunity to tap into and benefit from meditation.

Thus, when we explore the world of meditation, it is important to remember its origins so that we may make the distinction between practices that better serve the regular layperson versus practices that serve the lifelong ascetic.

In other words, not all meditation practices are designed for us simply because we have not pledged our lives to a tradition, like a monk or nun. We may struggle with these practices and find it difficult to meditate in certain ways because our lives are vastly different from that of a monk, much less a monk that existed in 200 AD.

Meditation practices are designed to serve the life process, not work against it. If you find yourself struggling to meditate, thinking that you are bad at meditation, or feeling like meditation doesn’t work for you, congratulations! It’s actually a wonderful thing that you are encountering difficulty - it indicates that you are so in tune with your life process that you can sense when certain practices are not suited for you.

Here are the main ways in which our life processes differ from monks, and how that changes the way we need to meditate:

The ancient ascetic lived a very simple life. We live in a much more stimulating way.

The life of a monk is very straightforward and simple. They have a regimented daily schedule and spend their days in practice, study, and doing daily chores. Sometimes they may go even further and take vows of silence or dedicate their life to solitude to make their life as minimalistic as possible.

The life of a monk is simple because they often seek purity and clarity. Thus, their meditations will continue to further their goals of cleansing the mind, body, and soul. If you find yourself turned off by meditations that preach purity, wonderful! You have not pledged your life to seeking purity, so those types of meditations won’t benefit you.

In contrast to the lives of ascetics, our lives are wonderfully complex! We ride the ups and downs of life in the real world and experience the full spectrum of life mentally, physically, and spiritually. Our lifestyles span a broad range, and our days never follow the exact same routine.

Monks pledge their lives to their tradition. By living in the real world as a regular person, we are also making a pledge - we implicitly pledge ourselves to a life that is stimulating, dynamic, and constantly changing. Thus, the way in which we meditate should embrace this. This is the reason why many of us deeply enjoy relaxing, soothing meditations. Inviting lots of open space and freedom to softly explore without a set goal during meditation is another way in which we can meditate to compliment our stimulating, goal oriented lifestyles.

Monks and nuns renounce money, food, sex, and family. We interact with all these things daily.

The life of an ascetic is designed so that he or she interacts with worldly matters as little as possible. This means they essentially do not need to deal with money, food, sex, or family at all. The goal is to lighten their connections to the physical realm so that they can fully focus on their spiritual practice.

Monks do not need to concern themselves with earning or spending money. They usually eat simple, plain diets as vegans or vegetarians and partake in intense fasting. They swear off sex and live amongst their own gender to limit temptation. Ascetics have little to no contact with their family, and accept their brotherhood or sisterhood of their pledged tradition as their new family.

Our lives could not be more different! We are up to our eyebrows in anything and everything that has to do with being in the material world. We have a complex and extremely necessary relationship with money. Eating good food is one of our greatest joys. Romance, sex, and pleasure are mainstays in our lives. Interacting with our cherished friends and family are central to our daily routine.

To expect ourselves to excel at and benefit from meditation practices that have been designed for a completely opposite way of living is to set ourselves up for disappointment and failure. Instead, seek to meditate in a way that celebrates the fullness of our lives!

Here is where we can explore meditations that revisit our favorite memories, places, and experiences and allow the love, joy, and pleasure of living a full life wash over our presence. Another refreshing way to practice is to revel in what we crave and desire.

An ascetic seeks to transcend worldly matters. We’re here to live fully in the world.

Oftentimes the goal of an ascetic in the ancient traditions is to ascend and achieve a state of egolessness and non dualism. They will meditate to dissolve the ego, merge with pure consciousness, and transcend all worldly ties.

These meditations are designed to help detach the ascetic from material possessions and bodily desires, reducing the influence of the ego and removing identification with the external world. The goal is to minimize ego-driven desires so that they can connect and become one with a higher, more universal consciousness.

These practices are often extremely strict, repetitive, or demand a great amount of focus. They can feel quite harsh and abrasive to a regular person living in the external world. Such practices can also leave a regular person feeling ungrounded and disoriented.

You and I are not meant to transcend the physical realm but to fully live in it! When we are in the world, we experience, work with, and enjoy material possession and bodily desires. We are here to experience the full range of our ego and enjoy life as a sovereign, unique individual.

When we meditate, it is to celebrate our ever deepening involvement with all that our life presents us with. This is where we can experiment with meditations that allow for a more playful and fun exploration of our existence. Practices that welcome all aspects of our experience with warmth and compassion instead of criticism and self policing are much more suitable and healthy.

So what kind of meditation works for people like us?

Meditation practices that acknowledge, honor, and ultimately celebrate the fact that we are regular people living in the external world.

Life-serving meditation practices.

We live incredibly full spectrum lives. An aligned meditation practice is one that allows us to metabolize and digest the beautiful complexity of our lives.

This type of meditation practice allows you to fall in love with all that you love about life. It is a practice that is freeing, instinctive, and natural.